Too often we harbor anger toward others, and it eats away at our core. Now I know how to have a compassionate and understanding spirit when dealing with difficult people in any situation. If feels awful to be blasted by someone in an email or to have someone speak rudely to you, and it isn't acceptable. But responding with anger or not letting go of the situation doesn't improve the outcome. We must forgive and learn from the encounter. And at times, we need to reassure the other individual that the whole thing is in the past. This is an interesting inclusion in Kim Bearden's book, Crash Course, especially following the chapter about Play, but it is a crucial addition. We have all heard teachers "whine" about their jobs being stressful, and indeed it is. There are certainly ups and downs in education. |
Then.
But it did happen. Later.
And then it happened again. Another wall.
And again.
In 27 years, there have been lots of little walls to hop over, a couple of major walls to scale, and one massive one that just needed to be knocked down.
I think this book addresses more of those day-to-day fires that flame up in our faces. They are the fires that smolder in the overnight hours. Those worries that we've wronged someone and the anger and depression that comes by being wronged by someone else.
This is that parent who shakes an accusing finger in your face, or the boss who holds you accountable for something someone else did, but more likely it is the pain and struggle from failing to establish a real relationship with a student. It's the frustration of students not getting a concept even after you've retaught it in multiple ways. It's the kid who has a melt down because a game was lost.
Even more, this is that peer who doesn't understand you, or the peer who gossips and criticizes you behind your back. Or maybe it's that colleague who fights to pour your creative juices down the drain. It could be the teacher down the hall who makes you feel like you will never be good enough.
If you are struggling with feelings of anger, inadequacy, or sadness, it might be because you are really holding on to the past. Look, you might have been seriously wronged; however, holding on to the pain and bitterness will only destroy you.
It's easy to say that we need to let it go and shake it off, but it is oh so difficult to do just that. It's easy to say we should just get over it, or rise to the occasion, or be the bigger person, but it's not that easy to comply with own mantras.
I can say I'm getting better, but I'll never be able to claim victory in the Recovery chapters of my life. If you think you can, you're probably lying to yourself. But we can improve. Even into our old age, we can improve. Crying into the pillow probably won't solve the issues at hand. Neither will punching a hole through the drywall. We would do well to heed that old Bible passage from the book of James: "But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger."
With patience - and the understanding that it takes all kinds to make the world go 'round - maybe, just maybe, we can keep our feet firmly rooted and our heads out of the clouds of uncertainty.